Carmel Getaway

Photograph copyright MurrayBolesta

Tonight Kevin and I are headed to Carmel for some quality time with a few friends and family.

I’m very much looking forward to this weekend excursion.

I was born in Carmel. I actually lived the first six years of my life there.

But I was young (obviously), and life was… interesting… so my memories of living there are hazy at best.

I have some friends who have such vivid memories of their early childhood, and yet I feel like everything I “remember” from those early years are stories I have been told from other people.

Stories I have been told so many times that I start to think they are my own memories.

I remember looking for seashells with my grandma on the beach. I remember my mom picking me up late at night (she was a cocktail waitress) and carrying me up a long flight of stairs to my room, and I remember how she smelled like cigarettes and chanel no.5 and how that smell became the best smell in the world to me, because it meant she was home. I remember a birthday party where my father dressed up as a clown and I was scared because I didn’t know who it was. I remember my favorite babysitter, Stephanie.

But that’s about it.

Less than a handful of memories to show for six years of life.

I’ve often wondered what my life would have been like if we never moved.

If I had lived my whole adolescent life in the Monterey bay area.

Middle school, high school, etc.

Swapping flip flops for boots and tank tops for scarves.

I really can’t imagine it.

But there is a part of Carmel that lives somewhere inside me, because when I go back I do feel some sort of connection.

I can’t quite explain it.

It doesn’t feel like home (by any means), but it feels like more than just another place.

Perhaps a part of my subconscious arises from its slumber and says “I remember you!”

And it’s nice to wake it up every now and again and say hello.

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JeanOctober 12, 2012 - 9:28 am

i love love love this post. it’s just so sweet. thanks for sharing those memories, especially the part about your mom and the memory linked to her scent of cigs and chanel no. 5. makes me miss my mama a lot – she wore the same. have a wonderful time in carmel! love you!

CatherineOctober 18, 2012 - 11:30 pm

My husband and I are hoping to make it to Carmel very soon. I’ve heard it’s just beautiful there.

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